As girls head into their teenage years, questions and anxiety about menstrual periods are normal. The physical and emotional changes of puberty, along with worries about period symptoms and social embarrassment, can feel overwhelming for teens.
Sharing accurate information can make your child feel more prepared and less anxious. Here’s how to talk about her menstrual cycle, how to manage period pain, and more.
When Do Periods Start?
Menarche is the medical term for the first menstrual period. It marks the transition from childhood to adulthood when a female can become pregnant. Menarche usually happens between 12 and 14, but periods can start earlier or later.
Menstrual periods happen because hormones cause the uterus lining to become thicker with extra blood and tissue in preparation for pregnancy. During ovulation, one ovary releases an egg, which moves down the fallopian tube toward the uterus.
If sperm doesn’t fertilize the egg, pregnancy doesn’t occur. The uterus lining then breaks down and flows out through the vagina. This cycle repeats every 28 days or so.
A girl’s first period often happens without warning. But these physical changes caused by puberty hormones signal that menstrual periods are approaching:
- Breasts start to develop. Periods often begin about two to three years after breasts start to grow.
- Girls often have a growth spurt.
- Hair grows under her arms and in the pubic area.
- Hips widen.
- Skin becomes oily, which may cause acne.
Educating Girls About Their Menstrual Cycle
Talking about their menstrual cycle can help prepare your child and reduce anxiety. Ideally, try to start conversations before puberty changes start appearing. Introducing information slowly encourages questions and helps her feel more confident as she approaches menarche.
Besides talking about when periods may start and why they happen, explain what to expect.
The first few periods are often very light, like reddish-brown spotting. Periods may only last a few days and, initially, probably won’t happen on a regular schedule. She may go several months without a period, and then they’ll start up again.
Everyone is different, and although the average menstrual cycle lasts 28 days, it can vary from 21 to 45 days. That means your teen may get her period every 21 days or up to every 45 days. However, cycles can take several years to become regular.
Period symptoms also vary from person to person. Your teen may not have any symptoms. Or she may have these symptoms starting a few days before and for a few days while on her period:
- Breast tenderness
- Cramps
- Diarrhea
- Headaches
Using a period-tracking app can help your teen track her periods and learn about her cycle and how her body works. Period tracking apps can track:
- Cycle length — This is helpful for irregular periods because it can show whether cycles are becoming more consistent.
- Flow heaviness — Often, it’s heaviest for the first day or two and then tapers.
- Symptoms — Breast tenderness, headaches, or mood swings can signal an upcoming period.
Many period-tracking apps for teens also include educational articles. These articles provide extra information about a topic teens often feel awkward discussing.
How to Prepare for Your Child’s First Period
Your child will feel less anxious about her first period if you do these things together:
Buy period supplies
Discuss the options for period products and how they work. Purchase them in advance and talk about how to use them and when. Period products include:
- Menstrual cups
- Pads
- Period underwear
- Tampons
The choice of period supplies is personal and depends on what your child feels comfortable with and what works best for her. Many teens use more than one product at a time.
Create a plan for when it happens
Those early periods usually arrive unannounced and may not happen at home. To ensure your child isn’t caught off guard, talk about what to do if she gets her period when away from home.
Make a plan and have period supplies ready for school, a sleepover, summer camp, or work. You can also discuss what to do if she doesn’t feel well, like see the school or camp nurse for help.
Having a plan and stocking period supplies if your child travels between two homes is also wise.
Discuss how to manage period pain
Period pain is a significant source of anxiety for teens, so talking about it and calming your child’s fears are crucial. More than half of girls and women experience period pain and other symptoms. But often, it’s not severe, and it’s easy to manage.
Cramps and period pain are usually worse at the start of their period. They typically go away after a day or two. Most teens can manage period pain with:
- A healthy diet — Cutting out sugar, caffeine, fried foods, and fast food can reduce inflammation, which may reduce cramps.
- A heating pad or heat patches — Applying these to the lower abdomen helps relax uterine cramping and stimulates blood flow.
- Moderate exercise or stretches — Assure her that it’s OK to participate in gym class or sports while on her period as long as she feels well.
- Nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drug (NSAID) pain relievers like ibuprofen — These reduce prostaglandins, natural chemicals produced in the uterus that cause cramping.
Should Teens See a Gynecologist?
Gynecologists are doctors who specialize in female reproductive health, and they can see girls as early as age 13. Your child may benefit from an appointment if:
- They have severe pain or other symptoms during their period.
- Their periods are very heavy or long-lasting.
- They’re 15 and still haven’t had their first period.
- They’re sexually active or may soon become sexually active and require birth control.
Many girls worry that visiting a gynecologist means having a pelvic exam, but this is unlikely. Pap smears aren’t necessary before age 21, so doctors only perform a pelvic exam if medically necessary.
Instead, a gynecologist can:
- Answer questions about periods and safe sex.
- Discuss birth control options for teens.
- Prescribe hormonal birth control, like the pill or birth control shots, to help manage severe period symptoms. They’ll also review the pros and cons of these and potential side effects, like breast tenderness or spotting between periods.
Most teens have anxiety about periods and puberty. Honest and open communication helps establish a positive relationship with your teen and her body.