[{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org\/","@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/share-dev.upmc.com\/2022\/05\/mothers-day-with-pregnancy-difficulties\/#Article","mainEntityOfPage":"https:\/\/share-dev.upmc.com\/2022\/05\/mothers-day-with-pregnancy-difficulties\/","headline":"Handling Mother’s Day with Pregnancy Difficulties","name":"Handling Mother’s Day with Pregnancy Difficulties","description":"Mother's Day is a happy holiday for many families, but women struggling with infertility, postpartum depression, or pregnancy losses may have a difficult time.","datePublished":"2022-05-04","dateModified":"2025-05-13","author":{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/www.upmc.com\/services\/women-regions","name":"UPMC Magee-Womens","url":"https:\/\/www.upmc.com\/services\/women-regions","sameAs":"https:\/\/share-dev.upmc.com\/upmc-magee-womens-hospital\/","parentOrganization":"UPMC"},"publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"UPMC HealthBeat","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/share-dev.upmc.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/UPMC-HealthBeat-Logo.png","url":"https:\/\/share-dev.upmc.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/UPMC-HealthBeat-Logo.png","width":600,"height":60}},"image":{"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/share-dev.upmc.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/GettyImages-1309050890.jpg","url":"https:\/\/share-dev.upmc.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/GettyImages-1309050890.jpg","height":325,"width":754},"url":"https:\/\/share-dev.upmc.com\/2022\/05\/mothers-day-with-pregnancy-difficulties\/","about":["Health Topics A-Z","Pregnancy and Childbirth"],"wordCount":1484,"articleBody":"Mother’s Day is a happy holiday for many families each year. But it also might be a difficult day for others.People with pregnancy-related complications like fertility problems, miscarriages, or a peripartum mood or anxiety disorder like postpartum depression may have a hard time navigating the holiday.\u201cMother’s Day can be difficult for anyone who has not had a traditional course to motherhood,” says Priya Gopalan, MD, medical director, Psychiatry Consultation-Liaison Services, UPMC Western Psychiatric Hospital, and chief, Psychiatry, UPMC Magee-Womens Hospital. “And I think if you factor in people who’ve had multiple losses or miscarriages, Mother’s Day can be a pretty bittersweet holiday.”If you are having trouble with Mother’s Day, you are not alone. And there are options for you to seek help if you need it.Pregnancy Complications and Mental HealthSeveral pregnancy-related complications can cause mental health burdens. Those emotional challenges may become even harder to handle around holidays like Mother’s Day.Fertility problemsIn the United States, about 12% to 15% of couples struggle with infertility \u2014 an inability to conceive after a year of unprotected sex.Couples with fertility challenges are at risk for depression, anxiety, and other mental health burdens.A 2021 Fertility Research and Access analysis found infertile women had higher rates of depression than the general population. Studies have shown that the rates of depression and anxiety in couples with fertility problems can be as high as 60%.“This is a group of people who are already struggling,” Dr. Gopalan says. “Then you throw in a holiday that just celebrates motherhood, which might not be an easy kind of achievement for a lot of people. I think that makes it much, much harder and could even be traumatizing for some individuals.”Postpartum depression and anxietyMany women experience postpartum depression and\/or anxiety after giving birth. These conditions can cause sadness, loneliness, emptiness, worry, and dread for an extended period after a child’s birth. Women may have trouble connecting with their newborns or their families.Postpartum depression and anxiety are more intense and may affect your ability to do day-to-day activities.About 1 in 7 women experiences postpartum depression. Some studies have reported even higher rates of postpartum anxiety. It’s possible to experience one or the other, or both at the same time.Dr. Gopalan says a holiday like Mother’s Day could be tough for women with postpartum depression and\/or anxiety.\u201cWhen someone experiences postpartum depression or postpartum anxiety, their transition to parenthood might be a little bit different than someone who doesn\u2019t have a postpartum mental health condition,\u201d she says. \u201cSo, they may not feel that immediate bonding with their baby that other parents do. That can be really, really hard for people because they feel a societal burden of shame and guilt.\u201dIf these feelings don\u2019t go away after a few days up to a week, new parents can seek\u00a0support. Read more about treatment for postpartum depression and anxiety\u00a0and how UPMC can help.Pregnancy lossesA miscarriage, stillbirth, or other pregnancy loss is a traumatic experience that can have long-lasting effects. A miscarriage occurs when a baby is lost before 20 weeks of pregnancy. A stillbirth happens when a baby is lost at 20 weeks of pregnancy or later.About 10% to 15% of pregnancies end in miscarriage, while about 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth in the United States. Also, about 24,000 babies die within the first year of their birth, according to the CDC.Women who have any kind of pregnancy loss are at risk of depression, anxiety, and even post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). A holiday like Mother’s Day could remind them of their loss and bring forward feelings of grief.NICU parentsIf your child is born pre-term or is ill at birth, they may end up in the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU). Between 10% and 15% of babies end up in the NICU after birth.According to the Journal of Perinatology, about 40% to 50% of parents with babies in the NICU “experience clinically significant levels of depression, anxiety, and trauma.” Other studies say up to 60%. Dr. Gopalan says they experience higher levels of postpartum depression and anxiety as well.“There may even be shame, resentment, guilt, or other complicated emotions around celebrating motherhood or parenthood when they didn’t get to have that typical newborn experience with their baby,” Dr. Gopalan says.Understanding these challenges can help us to be mindful of the complex emotions around having medically ill newborns \u2014 especially around Mother’s Day.Navigating Mother’s Day Mental HealthIf you are experiencing depression, anxiety, or other mental health challenges on or around Mother’s Day, you’re not alone. There are ways to get help.An important first step is recognizing your feelings and validating them, Dr. Gopalan says.“You’ve gone through this incredible loss, you’re grieving, and then you have this holiday that’s celebrating the thing that you’re aspiring to,” Dr. Gopalan says. “So, I think the first piece of advice would really just be to allow yourself to grieve and to know that it’s not wrong to feel that way. There’s no right or wrong for experiencing emotion.”Beyond that, Dr. Gopalan says, it’s important to recognize signs and symptoms that you may need to seek treatment.You should seek help if:Your feelings are making it hard to navigate day-to-day life.You’re experiencing changes in sleep, diet, or other everyday patterns.You’re feeling disconnected from your loved ones.You’ve lost motivation, energy, or interest in activities.You’re experiencing long-lasting signs of depression or anxiety (racing thoughts, hopelessness, emptiness, dread, etc.).You’re having thoughts of harming yourself or others. Suicidal thoughts are an emergency, and you should seek care in an emergency setting.Treatment for Mental Health ChallengesIf you do need to get treatment, there are several options available for you.Often, the first treatment is talk therapy. Talking to a licensed professional about what you’re feeling can help with your symptoms. Dr. Gopalan says rapport with your therapist is important, and there are many ways you can find the right one for you.Antidepressant medications can treat anxiety, depression, emotional trauma, and more.Between therapy, medication, or a combination of both, Dr. Gopalan says many people who seek treatment are able to get the help they need. But it’s important to seek that help and not bury your feelings.How Can I Be Sensitive to Someone Having Problems?If you are a family member, friend, or acquaintance of someone who is having trouble around Mother’s Day, you can take steps to make things easier for them.Recognize their feelings. Sometimes, people may try to hide what they’re feeling, or they may feel that it’s private. But if you see signs that they may be having a hard time, acknowledge their feelings. Don’t brush the situation under the rug.Validate their feelings. Help them understand that they’re not alone and that they shouldn’t feel ashamed or embarrassed if they’re having problems.Ask them if they want to talk. If you see that they’re struggling, offer to be a friendly ear for their problems. Or recommend that they talk to a licensed professional who can help them.Normalize seeking help as being a point of strength. Many may view seeking help for mental health as a sign of weakness. Normalizing therapy and medication management can help people who are struggling.Although Mother’s Day can be a difficult holiday if you’ve had pregnancy complications, help is available if you need it. At UPMC, we offer world-class women’s care from a team of experts. Visit our website to find a provider near you.Editor's Note: This article was originally published on May 4, 2022, and was last reviewed on May 6, 2022.SourcesCenters for Disease Control and Prevention, Depression Among Women. LinkCenters for Disease Control and Prevention, What Is Stillbirth? LinkD. De Berardis, M. Mazza, S. Marini, et al, Clinical Therapeutics, Psychopathology, Emotional Aspects and Psychological Counselling in Infertility: A Review. LinkTiffany Field, Journal of Psychiatry and Psychiatry Disorders, Postpartum Anxiety Prevalence, Predictors and Effects on Child Development: A Review. LinkVictoria A. Grunberg, Pamela A. Geller, Casey Hoffman, et al, Journal of Perinatology, Parental Mental Health Screening in the NICU: A Psychosocial Team Initiative. LinkZahra Kiani, Masoumeh Simbar, Sepideh Hajian & Farid Zayeri, Fertility Research and Practice, The Prevalence of Depression Symptoms Among Infertile Women: A Systematic Review and Meta-analysis. LinkJohnna Nynas, MD, Puneet Narang, MD, Murali K. Kolikonda, MD, and Steven Lippmann, MD, The Primary Care Companion for CNS Disorders, Depression and Anxiety Following Early Pregnancy Loss: Recommendations for Primary Care Providers. LinkKristin L. Rooney, BA, and Alice D. Domar, PhD, Dialogues in Clinical Neuroscience, The Relationship Between Stress and Infertility. LinkU.S. Department of Health and Human Services, How Common Is Infertility? Link"},{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org\/","@type":"BreadcrumbList","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"2022","item":"https:\/\/share-dev.upmc.com\/2022\/#breadcrumbitem"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"05","item":"https:\/\/share-dev.upmc.com\/2022\/\/05\/#breadcrumbitem"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":3,"name":"Handling Mother’s Day with Pregnancy Difficulties","item":"https:\/\/share-dev.upmc.com\/2022\/05\/mothers-day-with-pregnancy-difficulties\/#breadcrumbitem"}]}]